O.K. So I have been following doctor's orders, right? And I have been doing my best to eat right, or right enough for me. I'm going along, minding my own business and feeling on top of the world because of the awesome changes going on in my world when I am blindsided by myself. How could I have been so poised and in control one moment and so out of control the next? Why do I embarass myself and others so much when a few tsh points drop? This is utterly amazing to me.
Calling the doc tomorrow. Something just ain't right and I can't rest easy to we fix it. Or at least address it.
Monday, September 28, 2009
Thursday, September 3, 2009
chronic corner
I recently reconnected with a discovery about myself. I have been the sick kid. I had a surgery by the age of six. I was in a wheelchair for part of elementary school. I had casts and crutches. I had a back brace. I had braces on my teeth, too. I thought I was leaving all of that behind in my junior year when I no longer had to wear a back brace. Then I was diagnosed with Grave's disease.
Suddenly, I was the sick kid all over again. I had three doctors. I took daily medication. I went in for monthly lab appointments. I had special circumstances. I was treated like the sick person, too. My friends knew that I wasn't going to retain information they relayed. My children knew that I was going to go ballistic on them for small things. My husband realized that he couldn't expect too much from me. All of this being ill has formed an identity for me. I don't know how people view me. I hardly know how I view myself. Still, I am a girl who gets sick. There are times when it plays a more active role. I have certainly been to the dark place and back again. But right now, life is good. My kids are thriving. My husband is steady as a rock. The window is rolled down and the wind is blowing in my hair.
Suddenly, I was the sick kid all over again. I had three doctors. I took daily medication. I went in for monthly lab appointments. I had special circumstances. I was treated like the sick person, too. My friends knew that I wasn't going to retain information they relayed. My children knew that I was going to go ballistic on them for small things. My husband realized that he couldn't expect too much from me. All of this being ill has formed an identity for me. I don't know how people view me. I hardly know how I view myself. Still, I am a girl who gets sick. There are times when it plays a more active role. I have certainly been to the dark place and back again. But right now, life is good. My kids are thriving. My husband is steady as a rock. The window is rolled down and the wind is blowing in my hair.
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